Motivation
by anubislover
Summary: During the Dark Tournament, Kurama is having doubts about his fight with Karasu, and receives help and motivation from an unexpected source.


So, this is my first Yu Yu Hakusho fanfic. I adore Shizuru, and I don't think she gets nearly enough love, so I thought I'd try my hand at writing for her. Hope everyone likes it.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything. If I did own it, the manga would not have ended, and there would have been more Shizuru and Botan involved.

"Speaking"

_**Youko's thoughts**_

_Kurama's thoughts_

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On a grassy hill overlooking the ocean, a lone red-haired half-demon was lost in thought. He had spent the day training for his fight tomorrow. He had done everything, from martial arts training, to plant manipulation, to practicing with the Fruit of Past Lives potion. But no matter what he did, he couldn't seem to convince himself he could win.

_What's the use?_ Kurama thought. _Karasu's more powerful than any other demon I've encountered. How can I possibly win?_

_**Simple, you won't, but I will. I'll be doing the fighting, remember?**_

Kurama mentally sighed. Ever since he first reverted back to his demon form, Youko had been more active in his mind, and each time he practiced using his demon form, the kitsune became more persistent.

_You may be fighting, but I'm still a part of you. And besides, what if he beats you?_

Youko snorted. _**He won't. I'll kill him. He'll be fertilizer before the match even reaches the ten minute mark.**_

The offhanded comment just irritated Kurama more. _How can you joke about this? That depraved lunatic is more powerful than anything either of us have ever faced!_

_**It's called confidence, Shuichi, something that, up until now, you had no shortage of. What you need is the right motivation.**_

_What do you mean?_

_**I mean, find something to live for. A reason to win this damn tournament and get back home.**_

Kurama glared. _I do. I have mother._

Youko rolled his eyes. _**She's not going to cut it. You said so yourself that she'd be fine without you now that she's found a new man in her life. Don't you have anything else to live for?**_ With that, the mental connection was shut, and Kurama was left alone with his thoughts.

Youko's parting words got him thinking. Did he have anything else to live for? Yusuke, Hiei, and Kuwabara were taking the same risks he was, so he couldn't live for them. There was as much of a chance that they would die as him. Genkai had proven that. What about school? He had no real friends there, or at least none that knew who he really was. So who did that leave? And most importantly, even if he did have something to live for, that didn't grantee him victory.

_Karasu's so powerful; it would take a miracle for me to defeat him!_ He buried his face in his hands. He was so preoccupied with his worried thoughts that he didn't even hear the soft footsteps coming up behind him.

"Brooding, Red?"

Kurama almost jumped out of his skin at the sudden voice, but managed to remain composed. Turning around from his spot overlooking the ocean, he was surprised to find a certain brown-haired psychic peering at him curiously. Nodding in greeting, he said, "Shizuru, I didn't know you were there."

She smiled, sitting beside him on the grass. "The great Kurama didn't sense me approaching? Either you were really lost in your own head, or you're losing your touch, fox-boy." Smirking in triumph, she took out a cigarette, ignoring the way her companion frowned and wrinkled his nose in disgust.

Kurama inwardly bristled at the jab, but managed to not let it show. "I was thinking."

Finally managing to light the small tube, she took a long drag before turning back to him. "So what's on your mind?"

He shook his head. "Nothing. Well, nothing important."

She snorted. "Don't lie to me, fox-boy. It's not smart to lie to psychics, you know. Someone as guarded and attentive as you being so deep in thought he doesn't even notice someone coming up behind him? Yeah, whatever you're thinking about must be pretty damn important," she drawled. Taking another long drag, she blew the stream of smoke right into his face. "Now spill."

Coughing, Kurama gave her a look that would have sent most demons running for the hills. "Don't blow smoke in my face! The stench is disgusting!" he snapped. Shizuru, however, just gave him a calm, steady look that showed that she had no fear of him, or any other demon. In fact, she actually smiled a bit.

"Thought you liked plants, though. And tobacco is a plant, right?"

"Yes, it is a plant, but in cigarette form it has one of the most disgusting smells around. It's a surprise you caught me off guard, I probably could have smelled you coming."

She raised an elegant eyebrow. "Are you saying I smell?"

Realizing just how rude he must have sounded, he quickly attempted to redeem himself. "Oh no, I'm not saying you smell, Shizuru! I'm saying those cigarettes are what reek, and since you carry them around everywhere…" he trailed off, having dug himself into an even deeper hole than before. _At least she's dropped the subject of what I was thinking about,_ he thought.

Surprisingly, she laughed. The sweet, husky sound caught him off guard. "I know what you meant, Red. I've been thinking about quitting, but I can't seem to find the right motivation." She took another drag. "But we're getting off topic here. What were you thinking about?"

_Damn,_ he thought. _Well, she won't give up until I tell her. That's one thing she and her brother have in common: stubbornness._ Sighing, he turned back to the water. "Karasu. I'm fighting him tomorrow, and yet, I'm more scared than I've been in my entire life."

She nodded sympathetically. "Don't blame ya. He's certainly creepy, and his power's through the roof. Great hair, though."

Kurama's jaw dropped and he turned back to her in disbelief. "Tell me you're joking. I'm going to fight for my life tomorrow, and all you can think about is his _hair_?! Are you insane?"

She laughed again, and the half-demon found himself enjoying the sound even more the second time. "Sorry, Red," she chuckled, "but it's true. Doesn't make him any less creepy, though. I'm just saying that he's got nice hair."

Though still skeptical and annoyed, he found himself asking her a question he had been too scared to ask himself. "Do you think I can win?"

She shook her head, earth-brown locks delicately brushing his cheek. They were surprisingly soft. "Not with that attitude you can't."

"What do you mean?"

Sighing, she drawled, "I mean have a little faith in yourself. If you doubt your own abilities, then you're gonna do poorly and get yourself killed. But if you believe in yourself and fight with everything you've got, you'll find the strength to get through it and even beat that guy." Much to Kurama's relief, she ground the cigarette against a nearby rock, extinguishing the remaining embers.

Kurama was touched, but still skeptical. "You really believe that?"

Stretching, Shizuru laid back on the grass, staring up at the sky. "Why shouldn't I? It's kept my baby brother alive, hasn't it?"

"You're brother's also lost the majority of his matches." Though he considered Kuwabara a friend, the boy certainly had a knack for underestimating his opponents and getting himself into bad situations.

"Yeah, but you're stronger than him, not to mention smarter." Surprisingly, her confident words brought a smile to his face.

Lying down beside her, Kurama ignored the still lingering scent of tobacco and took her in for the first time. He had always noticed she was attractive, but in an unconventional sense. Even Hiei had noticed it, having mentioned in passing that he couldn't believe she was Kuwabara's sister. Warm brown eyes, pale skin and lovely brown hair that looked soft to touch. She had a sort of calming aura around her, but it was also a bit threatening, as if to scare away those who wished to get close to her. Finally getting past the stench of her cigarette, he took in her scent for the first time. He smiled as his heightened senses picked up the individual odors of sandalwood and jasmine, with just a hint of lavender. Calming, earthy smells. They suited her, with her down to earth personality and calm nature.

_**Well, isn't this an unexpected development? Hard to believe she's human, she's far too pretty.**_ Youko said to him, taking in the woman next to him just as he had. Apparently, Kurama's change in mood had intrigued the kitsune enough to come back from the recesses of their shared mind.

_Back off, Youko. She doesn't need you sniffing around her like a dog in heat, _he growled through their mental link.

He could practically see his demon counterpart grinning. _**Why not? She doesn't seem to have any problem dealing with demons. She's certainly tough, and she has a certain charm about her. Besides, she's certainly attractive enough, and you can't say you haven't enjoyed talking to her. I'd say she's the perfect companion for us. Smart, calm, understanding,**_ he grinned lecherously._** Sexy.**_

_Back off. Yes she's all those things, but she's also my friend's sister. That makes her off limits._

_**So were many of the things I've stolen over the years, but that never stopped me! Only flaw I can find is her disgusting addiction to those sticks of tobacco.**_

_Well, at least we agree on something._

_**Of course, we could always find something else to keep her mouth occupied…**_

_This conversation is over. You will not touch her, and that's final! _Kurama snapped, attempting to erase the mental picture Youko had put in his head.

_**Maybe **_**I**_** won't touch her, but will you be able to stop **_**yourself**_**?**_ With that parting jab, Youko went silent.

"You ok?"

Kurama was jerked out of his thoughts by Shizuru's voice. Smiling congenially, he said reassuringly, "I'm fine. Just lost in thought."

She gave him a sidelong glance. "Talking to your demon half, huh?"

He blanched. _How did she know?_

"Your yokai went up. I've noticed it's been getting stronger lately, and over the past few days I've felt it go to almost insane levels at time, so I figured it was your demon side coming out to play." She turned onto her side to look at him. "Since I don't detect any threats in the area, I figured it was just him talking to you. Anything interesting?"

Knowing better than to lie, he said, "He was just asking about you." He chuckled at her surprised expression. "He said he couldn't believe you were human."

"Why not?"

Feeling a bit bold, he grinned and said, "Something along the lines of you being too pretty to be a human." He found an odd sort of delight in seeing her blush at his compliment.

"Yeah, well tell your counterpart that I am one hundred percent human, so he'd better believe it."

Kurama smiled softly and sat up, watching as the sun began to set over the ocean. _Looks like the day's almost over. _Suddenly, that earlier sense of dread came back full force. "Shizuru, what if I can't do it? What if he's too strong, even for Youko? That disgusting, lecherous creep is out to kill me, and I know that he'll get some sort of perverse joy out of killing me. He's as determined to kill me as I am to get out of this alive! What if…"

"Kurama!" Shizuru snapped, interrupting Kurama's panicked rant. She sat up next to him and began running her fingers through his hair. It was odd. When Karasu had done it, he had felt violated and sick. When Shizuru did it, he felt his self control return to him. Her touch was calming. "I know you're worried. You have every right to be. But if it helps, even if you don't believe in yourself, I believe in you. So do Yusuke, Botan, Hiei, and my idiot brother. If we can believe in you, then damnit, you can believe in yourself."

Kurama glanced at her nervously, though his heart began to swell up with joy. "Really?"

She graced him with one of her rare, affectionate smiles. "Really."

Feeling much more relaxed, Kurama smiled back at her. Glancing at the long forgotten cigarette butt, he wrinkled his nose again in disdain. "You know, that is a disgusting habit. Even Youko thinks so."

She quirked an eyebrow in an almost challenging manner. "So? What are either of you going to do about it?"

"So I'll make you a deal; if I start believing in myself and beat Karasu, you have to quit smoking."

Her jaw dropped. "What?"

Chuckling, he nodded. "You said you needed motivation to quit, so here it is." He smirked a little at her annoyed glare. He held up his hands attempting to placate her. "Hey, if I die tomorrow, your second-hand smoke can't kill me, so what would it matter? But if I do live, I plan to spend much more time around you, so I'd rather not have to endure the stench of tobacco."

Shizuru blinked in disbelief, her glare gone. "You want to spend more time with me?"

"Why not? You're a wonderful conversationalist, and I enjoy being around you. Your aura is very calming. Besides, you don't seem to mind that I'm a demon, and you're not one of my fangirls. I'd love to spend more time with you." He gave her a rueful smile. "Even Youko seems to have taken a shine to you."

"Has he now?" she quipped with an amused smile of her own.

"Yes, though some of his thoughts would probably result in you slapping him." They both laughed. The thought of the great demon thief getting slapped by a human girl was pretty amusing. Calming down, Kurama got right back to business. "So, do you agree to my terms?"

"Fine, but I have one more condition for the deal."

Kurama felt a little uneasy at the sudden gleam in her eye. "What?"

Once again she ran her hand through his hair. "If you live, you have to make an appointment at my salon."

It was Kurama's turn to blink in confusion. "What? Why?"

"Because your hair is a mess, Kurama. Seriously, I know girls who would kill for hair like yours, but you don't seem to take care of it. So, I'm going to do it for you," she scolded, shaking her head.

He sighed and rolled his eyes. "If I must, though it hardly seems fair. I mean, I'm fighting for my life here. My hair is hardly a priority."

"Maybe, but I simply hate watching such nice hair go to waste. If you intend to keep it this long, you have to learn to take care of it, and I'm willing to help you. So, do we have a deal?" She held out her hand expectantly.

Grinning, Kurama took it. "Deal. If I live, you'll stop smoking, and I'll take better care of my hair."

"Good. You'd better live, Red. I'd hate to see that creep win."

Hand still clasping hers, he stood up, pulling her with him. He smiled and gazed into her eyes, fascinated by the way the setting sun reflected in her amber irises. "I guess I just needed the right motivation."

"Oh?" she said, smiling and cocking her head. It was surprisingly cute.

"Yes. More chances to have talks like this with you."

As they stood there, gazing into each other's eyes, the sun setting behind them, Kurama felt a new surge of confidence. He could win. All he needed was to believe in himself. After all, his friends had faith in him, Youko believed in him, and Shizuru had given him a reason to win and return home. _Perhaps Youko is right. She is a fine companion. Maybe she'd be interested in something more than friendship._ He smiled at the thought. If she was willing, he wouldn't rush her. There'd be plenty of time after they were all out of danger.

XXXXXXX

So, what did everybody think? It's my first YYH fic, but the idea just wouldn't leave me alone. Please review and tell me what you think, I'd love to hear your thoughts. Also let me know of any grammar or spelling mistakes, please. Keep on Rollin'!


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